The Mirror Of A Soul
by KezGirl
Summary: Danielle..friend of Chuck writing her own book about the boys but especially about Dean's feelings. What happened when Dean meet her ? how he will react readings her lines? Find out now ...Dean OOC
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! I just want to mention that I don't take credits for any character I use on my fan fiction apart Dannielle ****I don't own Dean's description nor the impressions and nothing that you'll read in Danielle 's book/****. Hope you enjoy my story and please write a short opinion 'bout it .**

"Dean Winchester is flawed and that makes him perfect. He can be obnoxious, pushy, close-minded, and bullheaded. He can also be brave, fiercely protective, compassionate and steadfast. He can be both incredibly selfless and incredibly selfish, sometimes in the same breath. No one can relate to a character without flaws and Dean has them aplenty and readily admits it. He doesn't strive for perfection. Hell, he doesn't even think of himself as a hero. He does what needs to be done because there's no one else to do it. Which makes him more of a hero than anyone who claims to be one.

He's spent his entire life being the strong one, the anchor. Not only for Sam, but to a certain extent his father. He became the mother figure; in his own irascible, flippant way. He is the glue that held them together, the one who never lost sight of the fact that vengeance was secondary to family.

He can be vengeful, but he has limits to what he's willing to do for revenge. The present is more important to him than the past. His family has always come first with him; he was willing to subjugate whatever dreams or aspirations that he had to stand by his father's side and be whatever John needed him to be. Because John often left Dean in charge when he went hunting, Dean was forced to create his own way of dealing with his fears.

He had no one to assure him that Dad was going to return alive and well, no one to share that burden with, not even Sam. So he reassured himself. He built John up into a superhero, because to face the fact that John was only human would allow Dean's fears to take precedence. And he couldn't afford to be afraid. He had to be the strong one, for Sam. That is the root of Dean's faith in his father.

It was the only way he could survive his childhood without giving in to the terror that his father would go on a hunt one day and never come back. The idea that John always knew best was reinforced, of course, when Sam was endangered because Dean disobeyed his father.

Since they were children, Dean has put on a brave front for his younger brother. He makes light of things, so that Sam won't worry. Because of this, it is extremely difficult for Dean to open up about his feelings to anyone, but especially Sam. It goes against his every instinct to let his little brother see him vulnerable. It's his job to take care of Sam, not the other way around. That's just ingrained in Dean.

It takes a lot for him admit to his fears, to share his burdens with his brother. He conceals his issues behind a smartass, gungho, horndog attitude. He takes pleasure in the simple things; food, alcohol, sex, music, his car, and beating the crap out of evil things. If he focuses on these things and not on the larger picture, he can fool himself into thinking that this life is perfect for him.

That it's what he would have chosen, if he had ever been given a choice. The truth is, more than anything else, Dean wants a family. He wants someone to love and who loves him. John and Sam filled that capacity to a certain extent, but when Sam went off to school, Dean realized that Sam had other aspirations that didn't include him…."

Danielle? Are you hungry?

Uhm..no! is ok Chuck. Thank you for asking

What are you doing there? Writing again?

Yeah [I smile looking into my laptop and tucking a strain of hair behind my ear]. I don't know what's going on with me today but seem I have inspiration. Is like I can't stop writing, the ideas come one after another and my hands work for me. I just guide them. Is crazy [ I shake my head smiling looking at Chuck standing in front of me with a beer in his hands]. Since when the prophets drink alcohol? [ I look surprised at the bottle in his hands]

Since the Winchesters pop into my life [he lift his bottle as "cheers" and took a gulp]

Can't say I blame you [a smile appeared on my face looking back at the screen reading my last lines]

Let me guess: Dean Winchester?

What are you ,a mind reader?

I wish but it happens to know that you have that smile on your face only when you write about him. What chapter it is?

I don't do chapters, Chuck!... and between my books and yours is a big difference. I write for passion and not because an angel whisper me things into my ear. I have no intension to publish what I write, is just … [ I try to find my words, the right words but nothing came up]

I've read what you write so far. Is a biography , Dean's biography with some of your personal impressions.

Look Chuck, I've seen Dean trough your eyes and those angels who whisper you in your ear all day long. I never meet the guy and since last month I thought is a simple fictional character , a character I felt connected with. I've read your books and I have to admit you're the worse writer ever [ I tease him a bit but he knew I was right : he is the awful writer ever and the fact he sells his books is because of the angels sitting on his shoulder] but if there's something real and horrible in there…that's the life those 2 brothers live. Writing was always my passion.. just try to see my book like my personally diary than something hanging on a library shelf waiting to be sold.

And here we go again with the judgement [ Chuck replayed drinking again from the bottle]

I don't judge you Chuck. I never did ..all I'm saying is that I write for passion. I have a job, I have a way to gain money and pay my bills. I just feel like writing and let all I have inside go free ..even if all I have to use is a damn laptop.

[Chuck smiled and let me continue my writing while I didn't move following him with my look. I knew he didn't had a choice and that he was the one chosen . I've heard from angels and demons and the entire apocalypse thing from his books , from his writings but I never knew all those things that everyone run off, the monster in the closet is real until Chuck proved me the opposite confessing me about Dean and Sam. I knew Chuck for a short time but he knew how to be a friend and when to put a limit not to hurt you with the situation he's in. I've always admired that at him. ]


	2. Chapter 2

_**~Chapter II~**_

"…Sam wanted something more than Dean could give him. I think that hurt Dean very deeply, because he's given everything he has, everything he is, to his family. To realize that it wasn't enough for Sam was very painful. When Sam left for college, Dean felt abandoned. When John left to pursue the demon on his own, Dean felt abandoned all over again. He gives everything to these two people, but sometimes they can't see beyond their own ambitions. Because of this, Dean thinks that he's not as important to them as they are to him. 

The way in which John raised Dean fostered insecurities. His father placed a great deal of responsibility on him; he wasn't shielded as Sam was. John drummed into Dean that his job was to take care of his little brother. Of course Dean is going to feel as though Sam is more important than him.

Even when John sacrificed his life for Dean, I believe that Dean still felt uncertain of his love. I think that Dean believes that John died for him so that he could save Sam. Obviously, Sam felt closer to Dean than his own father. If they had been left alone together, they would have clashed endlessly and Sam would have felt more alone than ever and therefore been more vulnerable to Azazel's influence. It's probable that he would have turned dark. I think Dean thought of that and believes that his father died, at least in part, to save Sam.

Which makes his decision to sell his soul to bring Sam back to life a natural progression. Part of it is that he couldn't go on living without Sam. His family has been the core of his existence for his whole life. He couldn't stand the thought of going on alone. The other part is that he truly thinks that Sam deserves to live more than he does.

It's ingrained in him to put Sam before himself. At that point I believe he thought of Sam as almost saint like and himself as a degenerate sinner. His only redemption would be to sacrifice himself for his brother. In that way, he could pay for all his sins and make up for "failing" his father. In a way, having only a year to live became a good thing for Dean.

It forced him to look at himself and his life and realize that he wasn't completely worthless. His impending doom made him admit to himself that he didn't deserve to go to hell; that his only merit wasn't just protecting Sam. It even forced him to admit that John wasn't faultless; that he was wrong to dump so much responsibility on Dean. Of course, it took him a long time to reach this epiphany and he, in typical fashion, compensated for his fears by acting like an ass..."

Oh awesome! Is 3 am already? Where did the time flew? [ I looked at the watch on the table rubbing my eyes, feeling tired but in the same time still having tons and tons of things to write, many points of view to analyze Dean as an " ALL". I saved my documents and shut down my laptop going to my room to take some rest. As I fall onto the bed I fall asleep as a baby. My body was tired, my mind still "busy" and my brain still working making me dream of pages of books falling as a rain around me, pencils on the floor and words flying around me. Crazy? Tell me about it!]

Good morning sleeping beauty [ I hear a voice as at the end of a tunnel. I move in my sleep like asking just for 5 more minutes of sleep remembering of my school time when my mom used to wake me up, give me breakfast and guide me to the buss station. I open one eye lazily and see Chuck's funny face with a stupid smile on it]

Oh c'mon Chuck, give me a break! [ I said pissed for waking me up and put the pillow on my head trying to hide from him and whatever he has to add ]

Danielle , wake up! There's someone I want you to meet [ Chuck add making me take the pillow from my face and look at him curiously] .

Enlighten me Einstein ! [ I replay resting my body in my elbows looking sleepy and still tired]

I think you should take a shower, put something on and see it yourself ! [he said before leaving the room making me throw a pillow after him]

Just knock the door the next time! [ I shouted loud enough so he could hear me getting of my bed and go take a shower changing with some clean clothes, put some mascara and lipstick and going downstairs to meet the person that Chuck wanted me too]

Well Chuck here I am [ I said not playing attention to the others in the room but just looking annoyed enough for being awake at 8:00 in the morning after going to sleep at 3:00] so? What's burning? [ I asked placing my hands in my hips , raising my eyebrow and waiting for an answer. Chuck looked at me amused making me throw something in his face before opening his mouth to speak]

Danielle… I want you to meet Becky [ Chuck looked a bit embarrassed keeping that stupid smile on his face], she's one of my biggest fans [ he finish his line with a huge grin making me roll my eyes]

And I'm awake at this hour because…? [ I pause giving him a pissed glare rolling my eyes again before looking at Becky and show her a fake smile] Oh nice to meet ya '

Same here! [ she replayed with an excited grin almost jumping of happiness of meeting a …what?... oh yeah… a complete stranger. Keeping that childish smile on her face she looked at Chuck "whispering" more like a loud line] She's jealous! [ making me roll my eyes and shake my head ready to leave the room]

I don't think so ! [ I could hear Chuck whispering her back in the same unique style as she did ] Uhm.. Danielle wait. I asked you to come because there's something we want to tell you .

Oh! Let me guess. You 2 getting married? Congratulations! Can I go now? [ I point to the stairs with a fake grin]

No we're not getting married [ he rolled his eyes giving me a look trying to make me be serious on the matter and listen to him making me letting my guard down a bit]

Ok what's going up? What's that so important you want to tell me?

I wanted you to meet Becky because…[he pause trying to find his words making me look worried] … i will start publish again. You know … the Sam and Dean books

Tell me you're kiddin' [ I gave him a " I can't believe it" look meeting my eyes with his]

I'm as serious as I can be and that's not all [ he pause again looking uncomfortable]

Oh, there's more? [ I asked raising my eyebrows in astonishment ]

Becky thought a convention for the fans of Sam and Dean would be nice to promote the new books so I accepted.

Becky thought? Fans convention? Promoting the books? [ I raised my voice with each question] You gott' be kidding me! Chuck there's Sam and Dean's real life in there. I mean you know what happened the last time you ever agreed with a convention ..you can't do this to the boys.

I have no job, I don't sleep, I barely eat and all I keep doing is writing about them , drinking and hearing angels talking in my mind. I have no money, I have nothing else left. So you tell me what should I do? [ chuck asked me with a desperate voice that made me see he was right. Maybe it wasn't the best he could do but was his only hope, besides if the angels would have wanted those books to be published they would have been ]. Would you be present? I wish to see you there that day but if you say no I'll understand.

When the convention will be? [ I stood there shaking my head looking at the floor with my hands placed on my hips not believing what I just ask]

Tomorrow! Tomorrow at 12:30 at the theater from the center of the city. So?

This is crazy! This is absolutely crazy! [ I take a deep breath before looking back at him still shaking my head in disbelief] Count on me. I'll be there.


	3. Chapter 3

_**~Chapter III~**_

"…to sum up Dean, he is a very protective older brother and is obedient to his father's orders. He is selfless, particularly when it comes to Sam, determined, and devoted to his "job" of hunting evil (unless the job interferes with Sam's life), his brother, and the few people he loves.

He does not share his emotions, thoughts, or feelings with anyone, and on the rare occasion that he does, he will only share with Sam and only when he is pushed or reaches an obvious breaking point. These are just a few of the things that make up Dean's complicated personality.

In order to understand what has made him into the person he is today, it is important to study what Dean needs to keep him going in life and what his childhood was like. It is these two factors which seem, above anything else, to have had the most impact on his life in general, and as such, seem to have had the most impact on his personality.

Though he seems to enjoy being around people, particularly women, and he has recently stated that he likes being part of a team, he does not attach or open up to other people easily, keeping all information about himself under wraps or even lying about himself. He does not seem to want to meet this need with anyone else. He feels that he is a "freak" and "sooner or later everyone's gonna leave me". He would "rather die" than kill his brother. Even Sam points out that Dean is so scared of being alone that he would rather let other people die than kill him… "

Ring- Ring, Ring- Ring [ I felt my cell-phone vibrate on the table taking me out of my writing world and pick it up] Message from Chuck, I wonder what he wants now [ I roll my eyes before pushing the red button to hear it]

Hey, is me Chuck [he pause as always before continuing his line] … yeah! Who else , right? I was wondering if you forgot about the convention. Is about to start and I see you nowhere. I just hope you didn't changed your mind . Uhm.. see ya' [he paused again] I guess [ he hang up the phone making me squeeze my eyes and place a hand on my forehead]

How could I forget it? [ I saved my applications and shut down my computer going upstairs to take a shower still thinking this is the most bad idea Chuck ever had but I was his friend and I had to show him support.] Being a friend suck big ass in those moments [ I said to myself as I get dressed, picked my keys and slam the door behind me]

Danielle! [ I heard Chucks voice in surprised as I step out of my car taking my sunglasses off and look at him with a smirk]

Oh yeah, that's my name cowboy [ I slammed the door of my car making some steps toward him and climbing the stairs to get inside the theater and see the "miracle" including some stupid guys wearing the same clothes as Sam and Dean, trying to act like them and "save the world" God bless me ]

Oh my God! Oh my God! Their here! [ Becky cut the private moment between me and myself (smirks) with her screams making me think she's completely crazy when I heard Chuck saying a subtle " Oh no!". I looked at him confused before turning to see Becky hugging a tall man with shaggy hair and another one with short spiky hair next to him ]

Who are they? [ I asked looking at Chuck and waiting for an answer that I prayed to God not to be " There's Sam and Dean"]

You really don't recognize them? [ Chuck answered me with a sky sarcastic voice making me became serious looking at the guys again]

Their Sam and Dean? The real Sam and Dean? [ I asked again surprised but this time giving Chuck a surprised look as well]

Save and kicking [ Chuck tried to be funny again but I was to surprised to react, staring at the boys and Becky's childish attitude jumping all around them, super excited of seeing Sam and with her eyes almost poping out of her orbits getting Sam naked in a blink on an eye. I stood there, on the stairs watching them for a long time, time in which Chuck joined them trying to explain what's going on here but also to find out how they found about it. Sam seemed a little kid, a kid with problems, trying to escape , hunting an opportunity to get out while Dean had a harder expression on his face as a fighter, a true one, a devoted brother and a true hero…that hero I was writing about , that hero I knew only trough Chuck's books but never meet. Now it was the time, the big day, the day of having my hero in front of my eyes but instead of feeling like an excited Becky I felt I don't belong near him, I felt I should stay away and simple watch and analyze, enjoy the view and keep my mouth shut]

Oh Chuck, here you are!

What's going on?

Guys? [ I could hear Chuck's scared voice from the stairs which made me smile. Oh course the boys had no idea of the fan convention and the worse part is that both seemed pretty worried]

Oh yeah. I feel the fun coming up! [ I said laughing to myself placing my hands in my pockets looking in their direction]

Uhm I'm kindd' … What you guys doing here? [ Chuck tried to change the subject but it was obviously a very bad idea when it was about the Winchesters]

You asked us to come here [ Dean answer firmly… with the same attitude I always picture him with]

No I didn't

Yes you did! You text-ed me [ Sam give him a "what the hell's going on look" trying to explain Chuck how they got there]

No, I didn't send you a text [ Chuck once again tried to calm the spirits but obviously he got them fired up when Dean gave him a glare]

We drove all night!

I'm sorry! I don't understand what could have…[ he paused thinking before looking at Becky] Oh no!

What? [Dean asked pissed making me smile. Same tough guy the books reveal]

Did you took my phone? [ Chuck looked at Becky almost ready to cut her throat off]

I just borrow it…from your pants

Beckyyy

What? They sure wann' see it …

See what? [ the both brothers asked in the same time making me giggle]

O-M-G I like it when they talk in the same time! [ Becky got excited again while Chuck and the boys exchange some glares. I smiled but also felt sorry for Chuck because I knew the boys won't understand it , not again anyway . I stood there just little bit longer before turning around and going inside the theater giving them some "space" to clear their problems but as I stepped inside I knew the real problems are just about to begin ]


	4. Chapter 4

_**~Chapter IV~**_

- Hey Dean! Looking good [ I could hear a men's voice sounding ridiculous behind my back]

Who the hell are you? [ a firm serious voice interrupt him making me froze]

I am Dean too…duhhh [ the ridiculous voice answered him]

Oh oh is Sam and Dean! I'm in trouble now [ a guy dressed as a scarecrow add]

What? [ the serious voice asked confused but also pissed]

Becky? What is this?

Is awesome! A supernatural Convention

[silence could be sensed and also a lot of tension . I refused to turn my head and pick at their shocked faces. I wasn't ready for any meetings with the guys I only read in books. For the first time in my life, I felt like a girl reading about a superstar, willing to meet him, touch him and reach the star…for a moment I felt so … Becky and I didn't like the feeling at all. I took a deep breath and went to Chuck, grab his hand and make him face me]

Congratulations! The Convention look AWESOME [ I tried to quote Becky with her stupid excitement and all]. So..uhm.. you decided to add some spice to all this show? [ I pointed around]

I didn't called them. Becky did !

In the first place you should stop acting like a lover hunter. I mean…Becky? You serious Chuck? This girl put you in a big mess with the boys using you to get to Sam. This convention shouldn't be healed, the boys shouldn't be here and this mess could have been avoided. Couldn't you simple sell the books without all this creepy people trying to be someone who they have no idea about?

I know , I know but is to late now, isn't it? [ He looked at me with an "I'm sorry for not listening to you " look that made me let my guard down and try to find a way to help him get out of this mess…which was more harder than stop the apocalypse itself]

Guess you have no choice than play the game and pray to all your angels to get you sane and save at the end of the day because the Winchesters seem pissed.

I know. [ he look at me analyzing me with a weird smile on his face as I rest my body on the counter of the bar]

What? [ I asked feeling a bit uncomfortable of his looks] . I'm not playing Becky for you so slow it down Casanova. [ he laughed to my remark and cut me off]

I just wonder… why ain't you there, meeting Dean. I mean this is your chance. You've been writing about him for quite some time now. Don't you wann' get closer? Want me to introduce you to him?

I've been wondering myself the same since I sow them outside talking with you. I don't know, I guess I've never thought that someday I'll see in flesh and bones the fictional character that I felt connected with. It doesn't seem real ,you know? Like something is missing or that I'm just dreaming a stupid dream ready to wake up in every minute. But if there's something really awesome is that Dean looks , talks and has the same attitude I always pictured him while reading your books or writing my own impressions and looking around and see a bunch of douches playing him is just making me sick wanting for everything to end and be just them…the real them.

I'll stay out then but if you need a hand let me know. I can open a gate…

A gate to what? To meet a stranger? There's nothing better than a couple or drinks to open a gate Chuck [ I made fun of him and he knew that. I wasn't the kind of getting to a bar and fill myself with whisky, vodka or who know' what else. I wasn't sky but either the most popular girl in town. I smiled and watch Chuck leave for a long moment before sitting at a table, order a soda and go back to my writing. I let myself drown in my own "story" as I always do not hearing nor seeing what's around me]

Hey sexy? Can I offer you a drink? [ I hear a voice getting me off my world and smile friendly as I see a guy dressed as Dean Winchester with a smirk on his face trying to look like a real Casanova amusing me a lot]

Thank you. Is very kind of you ..uhm… [ I keep my smile being for the first time really impressed of someone trying to play a role that didn't fit him at all, thinking as I try to remember his name making him feeling confident about his role and charm] … Dean, right?

That's me doll face [ he said keeping that smirk on his face that seemed more glued to his face than real]

Doll face? [ I raised an eyebrow smiling wider before laughing softly]. You know? I don't remember reading that line in Chucks books but I guess that's Dean's new line and I feel lucky to be the first one hearing it . [ I couldn't believe I was actually talking with a fake Dean trying to hit on me but I played along seeing how much he struggled to play Dean]. Now if you excuse me , Dean…. I have something to do. Thank you for that drink… I might accept it later. Okie- Dokie? [ I said smiling friendly not wanting t be rude nor even to familiar]

Hey, I like her! She said "Okie- Dokie" [ the fake Dean looked at his brother while speaking and pointing at me letting me with a huge smile on my face shaking my head and turning to the counter to see someone in front of me…it was… no way…]

Nice way refusing Dean Winchester. [ the serious voice from earlier talked with me now. That guy I sow outside talking with Chuck, was now in front of me smiling while sipping his drink , that guy was non other than Dean Winchester himself…the real Dean ]

Well that was a first …. [ I tried to answer but I couldn't ]

A first for what? …refusing or being invited to a drink? [ He asked me with a soft smile that seemed more like a smirk and his eyebrow raises just a bit making him look so … so … ]

I'm more like the attention - giver than the attention - taker . Guess this "doll face" has been taked by surprise [ I laugh lightly putting a strain of hair behind my ear . he smiles looking at his drink and for the first time I've noticed he wasn't that womanizer man from Chucks books… I could sense a new Dean but way to far a happy Dean.]

Ain't you supposed to enjoy the convention and stalk one of the brothers around here? [ he looks over his shoulder at all the madness around and back at me taking another sip of his drink].

I'm Danielle, by the way [ I lift my hand friendly and shake his smiling. It was a firm hand shake. His hand was bigger than mine, stronger and even more rigid but I enjoy it. I smiled and I enjoy it]

I'm Dean! … well, me and a couple of others douches around [ he answered frustrated that he couldn't be himself , thinking I might see him like just another dude trying to play his role]

Is a pleasure to meet you, Dean!

The pleasure is mine! [ he said giving me the same fade smile from early.. not being himself lately]

How did you end here ? You really don't fit the picture! [ he asked curiously not understanding my serenity in a place full of "Becky's "]

Actually I'm a friend of Chuck. I've read his books , about the angels, the demons the supernatural creatures… about Sam and Dean and I wanted to meet the writer… that's how I meet Chuck in the first place. He's a writer…a bad one I might say. Actually I'm a cop by day and a writer by night [ I chuckle to his reaction hearing I'm a cop and simple enjoy it]

So, if you're a fan as all the others… I'll ask again. Why ain't you there enjoying the "fun"?

Because… [ I pause looking at the masquerade around and back at him] this ain't my notion of passing a good time. Pretending being a second Becky , drolling and cheesing the boys isn't my style. I'm here to support Chuck in this madness and that's about it. And for the record… I'm not a fan …well not that kind of fan jumping around but more like someone trying to see deep into the story.

Really? And how "deep" you can see? [ Dean ask sarcastically finishing his drink]

Deep enough to made me write my own book [ I said with a tone that seemed more like a threaten than a friendly answer and I couldn't control it, making Dean stare at me like wanting to know more, maybe even wondering if I'm a prophet myself or if my books will end up in everyone's hands reading God's know what about them.]

Your own book? [ he asked me confused with a facial expression that he was about to kill me in that very moment]

Yes, my own book… [ repeat it with a friendly tone this time even smiling giving him a certain comfort for a minute but not completely to give up to that look in his eyes]. Is a book of impressions , not the kind of book the others will like to read anyway [ I laugh to soften a bit the tense atmosphere making him relax again and smile a bit]

What's the name of the book? [ I smiled again knowing he wanted to be completely sure I'm not like Chuck]

"The Mirror Of A Soul" [ as I said the name of my book our eyes meet and he froze on his chair . I smiled and excuse myself taking my laptop and going to meet Chuck ]


	5. Chapter 5

**~Chapter V~**

Uh … Chuck! I'm sorry for interrupting your little chat here ..[ I said to him interrupting his discussion with his fans and taking him aside ] … but I really wann' know if you're sure about all this? Are you sure you don't wann' back down? [ I asked him already knowing the answer. I knew it was to late , the fans ready to know more about the new chapters and the boys already here ,making questions …questions that Chuck couldn't avoid any longer . ]

I'm sorry Danny [ he looked at me as a hurt child would, asking for understanding and support…. Support I was on duty to show him for being his friend but in the same time I couldn't completely agree with this madness. It was two humans life in the game… two identity to reveal and two different stories to tell about some live and kicking hunters who were present at their own funeral]

I'm sorry too [ I said with a fade smile rubbing his back gently and leaving the room. I couldn't stay and watch the end of something I already knew it will be a mess… a mess that could cost Chuck his friendship with the boys and his own dignity .]

I went outside hesitating for a moment , looking back to see Dean in front of the bar looking back at me , following my moves and somehow wanting to ask me so many things with one single look. I smiles friendly looking directly into his eyes trying to make him feel safe, comfortable , ensuring him that his life and secrets are safe in my hands and that he has nothing to fear with me around. I closed my eyes and leave.

I drove for several minutes without a final destination, in fact I don't thing I was able to think straight at that moment . I couldn't stop thinking at Chuck and more less I couldn't forgot Dean's look when I leaved the building. Incertitude , fear, courage, hesitation… all mixed in one single look .

"…Dean makes it obvious that his family is what keeps him together. This need for affiliation, love, and attention from his family gives him both approach and avoidance motives: to have a happy, safe relationship with his family all together under one roof, and to avoid being alone. Dean is also faced with constant presses which trigger his motivations, like Sam constantly being in danger because of their job, Sam and his father arguing, and Sam's constant talk of being able to go back to school once they are done hunting The Demon. Because of these strong motivations to maintain a relationship with his family and avoid being alone, Dean acts in ways that can best meet his need for affiliation. He fights to save Sam's life even at a risk to his own, pledging that "If it's the last thing I do I'm gonna save you" He constantly plays peacemaker, keeping his father and brother from fighting with each other. He is willing to give up on finding The Demon and hunting in order to keep Sam alive…."

[ I shut down my computer resting my head on the table , closing my eyes and taking a deep breath] Thank you ! [ I could hear a voice coming from my room's door.]

Chuck [ I raised my head looking straight at him with a friendly and sincere look] .. I'm sorry… i…I couldn't stay till the end . I'm not trying to excuse myself but the fans, the meeting, Becky and after seeing the boys … it was to much. I didn't belong there.

- Shhttt… [ Chuck stop me seating on the chair next to me] . You were right! The boys didn't like it at all and I think I lost any kind of bond with them. Is not fair what I'm doing but in the same time is my only way to keep going without getting completely nuts.

**~ One week after ~**

It was a nice morning, the sun is shying , the birds are singing at my window and everything seem so calm and peaceful …almost to peaceful . I went to take a shower and change my clothes , put some lightly make up and a natural lips-stick and went into the kitchen to make myself a coffee when the silence was broken by the ring of my cell-phone

Good morning! What can I do for you? ..whoever you might be [ I answered almost admiring myself for the funny line ]

Someone seems to be happy today [ the voice answered me] .Good morning to you too Danny… Is me David Harrison … your partner? Remember me ?

DAVE! [ I answered happy to hear him again. It was more than a month since he was transferred to South Dakota . He used to be my partner for quite so long now but after he got married he decide it was better to move there with his wife and his 5 years old daughter Katie]. I can't believe is you! How have you been you traitor?

Traitor? Who? Me?... [ the hard laugh made me smile and remember the old days]. Nooo, not at all . In fact I was calling to show you how much I miss you.

Oh yeah? [ I put a hand on my shoulder and raise an eyebrow waiting to hear the rest . I don't know why but I always did this when he hit me with such chick flick lines]

Yeah ..indeed …. I called you because in South Dakota is a vacant post so I recommended you.

[there was a moment of silence between us , a crucial moment in witch I should decide to keep my old boring job as a cop in a city where nothing bad happens ..well apart Chucks madness from time to time… and a new opportunity to have my old life back… ]

Danny? You still there ?

Uh yeah.. still around [ I answered like I was playing attention to him all this time] Uh.. I should decide now? As right now?

Not really. I told my boss I'll call you and he told me you could take some days to decide but make it shorter ok ? we really miss you [ he said with the same warm and friendly voice he used to talk with me]

Tank you Dave . I own you one . I'll call as soon as I decide . give a hug and a kiss to your wife and sweet daughter. Tell them I miss them and that even if I decide not to take the job I'll definitely pay you guys a visit.

[with a hand I hang up the phone and with the other put a strain of my hair behind my ear looking on the window just to see Chuck in front of my house hesitating if he should knock or not. After the convention he decided not to involve me as much as before in his decisions and I didn't wann' push it. I wanted to give him time to come talk with me as he used to do before. I stood in front of the door of my house , watching him hesitating even turning his head to me despite knowing I was there .i smiled… ]

Chuck! If there's nothing you wann' talk with me there's something I wann' tell you. Would you wann' come inside, take one cup of coffee with a friend and just listen to her ?

[ he looked at me and simple nodded his head with a friendly smile before stepping inside and letting me close the door behind us . I hand him a cup of coffee and sit next to him on the couch taking a small pillow in my arms ] First of all I want you to know that you're still my friend no matter what you will decide. As a true friend I can't agree with you all the time and is my duty to share my thoughts .

I know, is just that I felt guilty enough after my last talk with Sam and Dean and I needed a time for myself. I'm sorry for baring you all the intentions of helping me or getting closer to support my moves.

You shouldn't. [ I answered with a large smile caressing his arm.]

What is that so important you wann' tell me ? [ Chuck asked me taking a sip of his coffee while I was the one hesitating now ]


	6. Chapter 6

**~Chapter VI~**

You're moving ain't you ? [ Chuck smiled while I gave him a shocked look]

But..? ..how did you ? …[ I wasn't able to end my sentence keeping the same "horror" look on my face]

[he smiled] The angels told me ! they use to tell me lot of things and NO .. they ain't talking only about the boys]

The angels told you? [ I asked still confused]

[he nodded again] Yes, they did . I know David called you and that you could have a new chance there. Besides you deserve more than a lunatic next to you all the time. That's why I came to your house but I hesitate knocking because it won't be easy without you around …but hey .. I'm not selfish either and the angels will keep me adjourned with everything you do [ he said laughing witch made me smile]. I think you should call and tell him you're going [ Chuck ended his line handing me the phone from the little table next to him waiting for my move]

[ I took the phone from his hand and slowly dialing Dave's phone number before putting it on my ear just to hear the ring] Yes! [ Dave answered firmly]

Uhm.. Dave? Is me Danny … I … Well I called to …[ I hesitate with each word looking straight at Chuck but he was smiling, smiling to encourage me to take the job].. well you know? To tell you I'll move there. Any room for me until I find a place to move in ?[ I said smiling back at Chuck but this time more confident witch made him smile larger]

We have a big couch outside…you can take it [ Dave made fun of me ] . Sure we have Danny.. just move your ass here. Katie miss you big time.

Nice way to tell me you're missing me more.. See you soon ![ I laugh and hang up again]

**~ 3 days later ~**

[ with one hand on the wheel of my car and with the other one on the window I was looking straight in front of me as I was driving not really playing attention to anything. Not to the radio that was singing for more then 2 hours , not even to my cell-phone that was ringing every 30 minutes… I couldn't avoid thinking at what I left behind even it wasn't to much. I took a deep breath and decided to stop to get some coffee so I can continue my row. I pulled over and grab myself some skittles and a dark coffee with a bit of milk . I seat on the hood of my car looking nowhere to be specific , drinking my coffee and reminding for a moment Dean's look at the convention. What was that? ]

Ok! I think this coffee ain't good [ I said to myself before getting back into the car to continue my row. 3 hours were separating me from South Dakota, Dave and his family and of course of my new life. How would it be ? How would it be starting it all over again?...Ring- Ring….my phone was ringing again and I decided to pick up the call]

Yep [ I answered playing attention to the road. ]

Hey Danny! Miranda speaking. I just wanted to know how much would it take you to get here. Dave is in the park with Katie and I wish you could be here in time for launch. You think you could make it ?

Sure do honey. I'll be there in time. I'm almost there [ I answered smiling to her good intention. Who I was lying ? I missed them like the freaking hell. I hang up the call and accelerate a bit more so I could get there in time]

**~ One hour later~**

[ I stopped the car in front of big house, with a yard full of flowers, a swing on the other side and a girl running all over the place. It was Katie … as beautiful as I remembered her. Her blond hair pulled in a ponytail and her sweet curls over her shoulders.]

Can I join you ? [ I asked her taking out my sunglasses and smiling large hopping she'll recognize me even if she was to little to remember me]

Aunt Danielle? [ her sweet innocent voice asked me as a smile was drown on her face as I was almost laughing at her big blue eyes were fixing me ]

I do not deserve a hug? [ I spread my arms waiting for her to run toward me as she finally did , hugging me with so much power ] I've missed you Katie [ I whispered to her ear as I was kissing her check still hugging her]

I was missing you too Danny !

Katie come back here now! [ I tough voice ordered her from behind my back. I clenched my teeth pulling Katie aside and turn to face the man who was yelling at her .]

And who the hell are you to yell like this to my girl? [ I asked angry turning to face the man… I froze as he did the same ]… Dave? [ I replayed amused]

Danny? OMG I thought it was a stranger trying to hurt my daughter [ Dave replayed hugging me in the same time]

I couldn't touch such a doll [ I laugh hugging him back]

Lets get inside. Miranda is waiting for you and she'll be so happy to see you [ Dave pushed me from behind with one hand as the other was holding Katie in his arms]

**I'm sorry if I insist so much on Dannielle simple life but is essential to write all this because that's how you'll understand more the purpose of my story and her purpose in Sam and Dean's life. She's a simple girl , with no gifts or superpowers but that will play a big role in the war of the Apocalypse. Plese give it a chance. Soon new things will happen and the boys will get into the story again. **


	7. Chapter 7

**~Chapter VII~**

"…It could also be argued that Dean quite possibly has a latent need for intimacy – a desire to actually share these feelings and emotions that he keeps bottled up. He has been known to open up quite easily to people who he has known only a short period of time. Within two weeks of meeting the first girl he ever truly loved, Dean tells her all about what he does for a living, an action which surprises even Sam, who wonders at how Dean could have told her that when their number one family rule has always been, "we do what we do and we shut up about it"

Later on, after his father has died, Dean opens up to a fellow hunter who he has known for mere hours, telling him that, though he cannot discuss this with Sam, he is not handling his father's death very well. Interactions like this make it clear that Dean really _does_ want to share his feelings with others and have close relationships, but that this need is one that he usually pushes aside, refusing to acknowledge it because opening up to others is simply too painful for him.

It is clear that John did not show Dean the affection that a child needs when growing up. Dean was the one to comfort his Dad when he got back after a hunt, telling him everything was okay. Dean showed his father affection, but his father never showed it back to him. He stopped being his father and became his drill sergeant, and because of this, Dean never got the affection he should have gotten as a child, perhaps attributing to his higher need for affiliation later on in life to make up for his lack of it as a child…."

[I found myself in South Dakota for more than a week now leaving with Dave and his awesome family . Katie ..a sweet doll who ask me every night to read her a different story, Miranda ..a women as you rarely get to meet and Dave who was like a brother to me… a new life, a new job and some interior peace I couldn't describe but in the same time almost ready for some unpredictable to happen. What could I ask for more?]

Writing again? [ Miranda stood in front of me leaning against the door frame with a smile on her face and her arms crossed to her chest] . You never told me you had a new hobby [ she came closer and sit next to me at the table]

I never knew either [ I chuckled not ready to answer many questions about my book and either about Dean. Not because I was ashamed of the passion I made for him and his life but because I didn't knew what to answer. How could someone understand why a girl like me will spend time writing about some science fiction life in their vision . Demons? Ghost? Lets face it … no normal person will believe in something like this ..at last not someone like Miranda and Dave…even thought they exist and I knew they did…Dean was enough prove of it .]

What is all about ? [ she asked me very interested on my book….as I wasn't afraid of something like this will happen. I roll my eyes and shut down my computer]

Oh nothing interesting. Just some romance kind f thing . You know how romantic I can be sometimes [ I laugh and made a funny figure to be more credible]

Well tell me more about, I'm all ears ..besides I have nothing more interesting to do . Katie is sleeping, Dave will get back in a couple of hours and all my house job is done. So ..? [ she acted like Katie every night I read her a story. I guess I had no chance to avoid it ]

What exactly would you like to know?

Everything you wann' tell me! [ she exclaimed with an angelic face while I shaked my head and laugh]

Well the name of the book is "The Mirror Of a Soul" and is about the life of a guy riding all over the country with his little brother doing all kind of jobs, helping people.

And where is the romance ? [ Miranda asked confused] Oh Oh is one of them about to find his big love and settle down? I love those mystery books [ she replayed letting me with a fool expression on my face not able to answer that. It was all the opposite …

I tried to find my words to replay but nothing came out.]

Uhm…well … you see those boys …. [ the door slammed again the wall]

Danny I have a big news for you. Two streets over is a small beautiful house for seal and I bet you would like it [ Dave broke the moment between me and Miranda and I couldn't be more happy]

Really? OMG that's a great news. I wann' see it. Do you think is possible to see it right now? I don't want to lose more time.

Is not that I don't feel good here, with you, but I need my own space and you need yours. Besides we'll be two streets away [ I smiled happy for Dave giving me such a good news. As much as I liked to live with them I needed my space as when I wanted to write, read Chucks books or simple get back home, take a shower and sleep. ]

I took the owner's phone number. We could call him if you want !

Sure I do. Give it to me [ I run to Dave as a little girl and grab the piece of paper with the phone number from his hands dialing the owner. ]

[ The voice answered] .. Uhm hello! My name is Danielle Russell and I called because I'm interested in the house you have for seal. Do you think I could meet you and see the house?[ I asked excited]

Sure. Meet you there in 30 minutes. I need to seal that house as soon as possible [ The man's voice was so nervous letting me astonished. Well at last I might have my own house soon…that was a tough that comforted me at the moment ignoring all the other things that might interrupt my moment]

He said to meet him in 30 minutes.

That fast? [ both Miranda and Dave answered in the same time a bit concerned]

What? The man might need the money and I might need a house. So? Anyone coming with me or not? [ I stood in front of the door with my jacket on waiting for someone to follow …or not]

The real action will start with Danielle's moving from Dave's house. Just a bit more patience . Promise *wink*


	8. Chapter 8

**~ Chapter VIII~**

[ 30 minutes later I was anxious to see the house while Miranda and Dave was looking at me as two parents worried for their child]

What? [ I asked looking at both of them]

Nothing [ they answered in union but just when I was about to replay the owner interrupt me]

Hi! Guess you're Danielle? [ he pointed at Miranda ]

No, in fact is her [ she pointed at me while I was smiling shaking his hand] Nice meeting you sir.

Call me Matt … [ he gave me a fade smile ..like a scared man trying to show his fears before shaking my hand back]. Lets get inside and see if we can seal the deal [ he said almost in a hurry while Miranda and Dave gave him a suspicious look]

[ we all stepped inside the house. It wasn't to big but either to small for a single person. It looked like an old house but the air was cold. The furniture intact and the bedroom just perfect for me starting a new life in. ] I'll buy it [ I said happy showing a large smile. I liked the house and I couldn't wait to make some changes in it.]

Good! I'll make the papers so you can sign them tomorrow [ the man answered soon after excitement]

That fast? [ Miranda and Dave replayed in unison again almost giving me creeps]

I need the money because me and my wife will leave town soon. This house was everything that was keeping us here. [ Matt answered but I could see that Dave and Miranda didn't buy it …it might be the policeman instinct? ]

We'll that's good then. [ Miranda broke the tension] Guess you'll have to move in soon [ she smiled caressing my back as a sister]

[ 14:30 in the afternoon : Me, Dave and Miranda were back home as I was telling them what changes I'd like to do in the house asking Dave's help with some stuffs when they both continued to keep that fools face as I rolled my eyes]

What is going on with you two? Even since we went to see the house you are so …so …so [ I couldn't find the right words pointing at their faces]. Anyone able to share?[ I raised an eyebrow as I place my hands on my shoulders]

I don't really like this hurry to seal the house. I don't know why but this Matt guy ain't giving me any good feeling [ Dave broke the silence]

And why not ?

I don't know [ he gesture with his hands] my instinct is telling me he's hiding something and to be honest I don't understand you at all. Is the first time you're acting so childish as we couldn't keep you here until you'll find something better. [ he added almost hurt 'bout my decision]

Dave, Miranda [ I took both aside to explain them my decision] As much as I like being here with you I'm 25, I need my pace and you need yours. I'm grateful for everything you've done for me but is time to move on and handle my own problems. In fact I agreed to stay with you until I'll find a place to move in …well that day finally came and is not like we won't see each other again, we're just two streets away [ I tried to look convincing as they tried to get over this situation and understand my point]

We're acting like two parents trying to accept that their daughter is big enough to move alone [ Miranda laugh as we burst into a huge laughing too] .

Well? Do I have your blessings now? Mommy? Daddy? [ I tease back while Dave hit me with a pillow]

I'm not saying I like this but you have my support [ Dave add as Miranda nodded her head]

[the next weeks they helped me renovate the house, paint the walls and buy the right furniture for my house just as they were about to move on with me. Now my house looked exactly as I pictured it . Miranda helped me put some flowers in front of the house and a swing like theirs where I so much like to drink my coffee in the morning .Dave changed all the pipes in the house and Katie helped me with the tiny details as decorating my house with some special drawings she made especially for me.

I took her in my arms and kissed her check as Dave and Miranda hugged me after seeing the house ready.]

Guess you're the owner of the most beautiful house in town [ Dave said admiring it from outside]

I still need someone to cut the grass outside[ I teased knowing how much he hated that ]

You should pay someone or better FOUND someone yelling to do that [ Dave teased back which made me smile reminding that passage from Chucks book when Dean was cutting the grass in front of his mother's house making me getting into my own world.]

What do you say about some coffee or a beer [ I gave a look to Dave] on the stairs outside enjoying the sun? [ I came with the idea like relaxing after all the work we've done that day ]

Sounds great [ Miranda said while Katie was already running toward the door which made as all laugh]

What about you girls go play with Katie and I make the coffee in my stile [ Dave made a funny figure and we gladly listen to him. We seat on the stairs laughing about Katie and her little jokes as I could hear a car engine stopping just in front of my house getting my attention. A brunette woman with short hair came out. She had a nice peaceful look and a friendly smile on her face and who could I forget to mention the police uniform]

Sorry to interrupt [ she said as I get closer to meet her]

No problem at all officer [ she smiled looking straight in my eyes realizing I wasn't strange of the police department from the attitude I was having with her]. What can I do to help? [ I asked friendly]

In fact I noticed that someone moved here and came to introduce myself and offer in case of everything. My name is Miller…officer Miller. [ she shake my hand as I shake hers]

I'm Danielle… Danielle Russell [ I answered back smiling]. Thank you for stopping by. In fact I guess you're my new colleague , the one I didn't get to honor to meet yet [ I said more confident while she gave me a curious look]

You're the girl Dave recommend?

Indeed [ I laugh at her funny expression before sharing my same feeling]. The pleasure is all mine. Guess I'll see you tomorrow at work.

Certainly! [ she answered one again before returning to her car. I followed her with my look just to see someone seating in the right seat of the car . It was an old man with an old cap and beard looking into my direction as our eyes meet for a moment. It was a peaceful look ,angry in the same time and my cop's intuition was telling me that was more behind it. I gave him a smile and somehow he smiled back before seeing officer Miller shaking her hand to say bye before going back to Miranda, Katie and Dave who was now waiting for me to drink my coffee]

Is getting cold if you keep ignoring it [ Dave showed me the cup and I gave them a smile before seating next to them and enjoy the rest of the afternoon and the beautiful sunset]

Please review and tell me what you think abut the story so far or what you expect to read in the next chapters. Hope you enjoy it as more SPN details will be read in the next chapters. Thank you for the patience and hope you enjoy what comes next.


	9. Chapter 9

[ I was living alone for more than a week now. I wake up at 7:00 a clock in the morning , drinking my coffee and doing my normal job but as in my old town there was nothing extraordinary happening ..more than a gang of young guys getting home , drunk after a night of partying , some disturbing the silence and some other trying to steal money from an old lady in front of a store but somehow in South Dakota everything seemed different…even the air I was breathing was different. I felt happy…at last for now everything went great.

I use to patrol my area at the end of each shift to make sure everything was alright . My area meant the suburb of the city where normally you can get all the "fun" but wasn't my case. After some minutes of peaceful driving I stopped the car in front of a yard full of old cars, classic cars, broken cars ..everything you need and you don't you could find in that yard. I stepped out of the car and went a bit further when I could head a voice behind me ]

Looking for something officer? [ a man was just behind me and for a moment his voice made me froze. I turn to face him carefully trying to look confident , just to see the same old man from officer's Miller car the day we met. My face expression soften a bit as I could feel nothing bad was about to happen]

No, I don't. I was making my shift and ….[ I pointed around not really finding the right words to express myself as his eyes didn't left mine not even a bit]

And what?... [ the man asked me . I smiled and approach a bit more]

My name is Danielle Russell . I'm the new officer in this town and every since I came I never seen a yard like this. I just wanted to take a look. I know I might breaking the law [ pointing at my clothes] while I might represent it but it just made me curious. I'm sorry… I'll leave now [ I said trying to make him see I'm not a threaten to him or his propriety ]

I appreciate your sincerity . and now what ? [ he crossed his arms looking at me with a raised eyebrow showing me he's not so friendly as I thought , making me hesitate for a bit but straightened the expression from my face to show no weakness . I'm the one in uniform after all ]

And now if you excuse me I'll be leaving [ I answered with the same nonchalance as he did earlier. He said nothing more and I cross beside him getting back to my car before leaving the place. That old man was giving me the creeps. After 20 minutes I stopped the car in front of my house getting the keys from my pocket to open the door. I got inside and put my jacked on the chair getting upstairs to take a shower and chill after another day of work.

I changed my clothes, put some make up and went downstairs to make myself something to eat . ]

I wonder where this cold came from? [ I ask myself feeling my arms and legs freezing despite of the warm weather outside. There was 35 degrees outside and I was freezing in my own house? What the …?

I shake my head trying to ignore the cold I was feeling and opened the fridge what I need for dinner. I was dying for a soup…a simple hot soup as my mom used to make me . She said she use to calm you down after a stressed day and guess what? Today I had enough of that …I needed a soup!]

Where I put the salt ? [ I was talking with myself looking for a little recipient ]

Oh here you are [ I took it from some corner of my kitchen's table and put it back next after using it . I mixed up and taste it closing my eyes. ] Yummy …still i should put some more salt [ I turn to get the little recipient again but I couldn't find it.]

I could swear I let it here [ I said confused looking at the same place I let . I look around and I finally found it on the little fridge I have next to the table]

Weird! I don't remember letting it here [ I said to myself think that maybe the chat with the old man in the yard affected me to much than it should. I took the salt again and finish my soup. I put some in a bowl and waited for it to cool so I can eat it.

The cold from the room was more and more annoying so I decided to fire up the little fireplace I had in the living room .I put some woods inside and looked for some matches . I light a match but suddenly extinguish itself. I looked confused and tried again…but the same happened. For the first time I was afraid, I look at the matches from my hand, the cold from the room and I realize something wasn't right.

I blow in the air just to realize that my breath was freezing . In that moment everything came back into my mind : The man wanting to seal the house, the salt, the matches, the cold air in the room … OMG .

I run to the kitchen and grab some salt just to feel someone throwing something toward me . I turn around and sow nothing behind me . I grabbed the salt with all the power I had trying not to panic and remember what Dean would have done in my place. Things were starting to move around me, the wind was blowing with all his force, the windows were closing and opened themselves and I was ... trapped in my own house.]

Just keep your cool [ I said to myself trying not to panic and make it worse. I made a circle of salt around me and took a knife in my hand looking all over for the ghost. The wind was blowing even harder and the circle I was in was each moment more thin until it disappeared . I run toward the door trying to open it but it was locked. I screamed for help and beat into the door for someone to come and get me out of there as fear, panic were rounding trough my veins . ]

Help! Please someone to help me [ I yelled with all my force hopping that someone will hear me. Suddenly a huge force was grabbing my shoulder dragging me back into the house and slamming my back on the wall cutting my arm badly. I froze feeling weak after the hit but tried to keep my straight .

As I tried to lift myself from the ground I could see an old women with an evil smile on her face…it was the ghost… the ghost that was hunting my place . but why did she show up only now after almost 3 weeks since I've moved there?

I tried to focus but the women grabbed me again slamming me again the wall again and pressing her thumbs over my neck to suffocate me . I tried to breath and reach for something to hit her but I wasn't able to. I felt my body weaker and weaker as she was drying all the power of my body . I wasn't able to feel my arms and either the air in my lungs …. She's gonn' kill me…this is my end ]

Die you son of a bitch [ I suddenly heard a man's voice as my body end up on the floor to weak to know what happens in the room. With my last straight I opened my eyes just a little bit to see the ghost burning and hear her screaming before losing my senses. ]


End file.
